Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
