I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
