the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize
