woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
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