You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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