dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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