Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
