everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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