when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
