I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i just had sex bonerless
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
