That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
