I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
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