dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
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