i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Send help, water and tortillas.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
