Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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