Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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