I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Randomize
