he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Randomize
