I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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