Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(201): View more from New Jersey

i only shaved half my leg

(201): View more from New Jersey

on purpose

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(248): View more from Michigan

I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time

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(843): View more from South Carolina

Hm. I declare blue a flavor.

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(510): View more from California

This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.

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(941): View more from Florida

I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure

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(361): View more from Texas

I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.

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(618): View more from Illinois

We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins

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(201): View more from New Jersey

I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.

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