I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
