You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
