The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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