I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
