its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I am available for nakedness
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize