In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
