Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
