Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(860): View more from Connecticut

yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her

(860): View more from Connecticut

but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"

(860): View more from Connecticut

but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies

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(623): View more from Arizona

I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.

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(913): View more from Kansas

I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off

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(636): View more from Missouri

Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok

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(281): View more from Texas

Btw I puked in your glovebox

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