Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
