I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
