i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
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