i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
