he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
