you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
