Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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