I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
