Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
