3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
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