Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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