Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
