lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
