last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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