what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
i now understand why vodka
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
