I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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