rhymes with "ouble enetration"
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
