scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
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