Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
So many bounce houses so little time
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
