I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
