"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
