Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize